I like sparkling water. It’s refreshing, I like to mix it with orange juice (which is generally too thick), or just on its own, if flavored subtly with citrus. None of this mango/kiwi crap.

But it’s like pulling teeth to find it. If you go to the super market there is the “soft drink” section—big as a football field and second only to the potato chip or breakfast cereal aisle. And then there is the bottled water section. Let me clue you in readers, bottled water is the biggest let-down since they took the coke out of Coca Cola. You might as well turn your taps back on, or get a Brita.

Fueled by high profits from sales driven mostly by hype and misinformation, makers of bottled water are even selling products that include vitamins or caffeine. Have you heard of the IBWA? Located in Alexandria, VA, every year they pat themselves on the back and give out awards in a whole host of categories, including best Web site.

Anyway, back to the store. If you’re lucky, you can find one tiny section in the bottled water aisle that has Perrier or maybe one of the Italian brands, at $2+ a pop. Thinking simple club soda (too much sodium) or seltzer water might be the way to go, I’ve also tried the “mixers” section, but because of its proximity to sin, the price is just has high.

Remember, if you’re thinking Whole Foods, I am discussing reasonably priced. It’s just carbonated water people! It should be like less than a buck a bottle. It should be reasonably free of lead and arsenic and E. coli.

That’s all I ask. Water, bubbles, maybe a little lime, costs less than gas.

Tags: bottled, water, sparkling, mineral, ibwa, brita