My Two Confederate Cents

So Roach on DC 101 disputes the validity of Manassas as a part of the South. Let’s ignore what some of friends claim as the Real South starting in Fauquier County. Roach’s point was that Manassas is a suburb of a northern town. And he wanted it disproved.

He’s wrong on both counts. Washington isn’t exactly a northern town. It was selected as the capitol precisely because it was in dead center of the original thirteen colonies, making it equitably accessible to the industrial maritime colonies of the north and the rural south. Washington may feel northern because of the urban feel to it, but let’s not kid ourselves; it’s ambiguous nature was completely intentional on the part of the founding fathers. I believe it was John F Kennedy who remarked that “Washington is a city of northern charm and southern efficiency”.

Secondly, while Manassas may not be confederate flag waving gunrack pick-up truck country, it has historically been a southern outpost. And finally, it really isn’t a suburb as much as it is an accident of geography. If we were to give Roach that DC is a northern town, and that all suburbs or exurbs thereof are by definition northern, how does Fred-neck get a pass? Or why is that Hagerstown, a mere 45 miles northwest of the District has the distinct feel of being the world’s largest truck stop? And we won’t even get into Calvert County and the SMIBs (Southern Maryland In-Breds)….

I mean seriously, Westminster is about as far west of Baltimore as Manassas is to the District. Drive up there someday and if you don’t feel like you’ve just hit Chattanooga, well, ribs are on me!

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