With the advent of Dan Brown’s “The Lost Symbol” this coming  Tuesday, the secret societies of the DC area are bracing for a sudden onrush of tourists to their places of…secrecy, I guess?  As early as Tuesday night (Seriously-how long does it take to read a Dan Brown book?) throngs of Dan Brown devotees could be showing up at your local Masonic lodge asking if they could just “poke around a bit.”  This story in yesterday’s WaPo (while taking shot after shot at Dan Brown and his audience) details how even little places like Rosslyn Chapel Trust see an explosion in tourism based on their supposed (and by supposed I mean created for a work of fiction by a writer of fiction, but it sounds real) connection to the lost mysteries of Christ.  Where Professor Robert Langdon goes, so go the masses.

No doubt, there will be an increase to some of these probable locales (THANKS Matt Lauer!) and you’re likely to get some folks bugging you with stupid half right facts about secret societies for the next two years (just in time for a movie to come out and start it all over again), it doesn’t mean you can’t have some fun.  For your entertainment, here are some ideas for how to deal with tourists in search of a “Secret Washington:”

1.) Stage an argument near one of these likely destination.   Have one person imploring desperately for help from another.  Just as it reaches a fever pitch, and just as your target is in ear shot, say “Will no one help the Widow’s Son?”   Then cast shifty looks all around, and sneak off together to go do something Masonic-y.

2.) Go on one of the inevitable tours that will blossom from this, and while looking at something old and mysterious (there is bound to be something), bend over and mutter “Oh my God..” just loud enough for others to hear.  Bring a little make-up brush and start dusting something carefully and say “Oh…it just can’t be!”  Feel free to exclaim “I found it” (specify it if you have read the above book and know something that could have been found) as you rush away from the tour.  Bonus:  Have two friends ready, dressed very neatly in suits, come “collect” you when you make your discovery.  Be sure to protest the entire time you are being escorted out-especially that the others “have a right to know!”

3.) Striking up a conversation with one of these folks, start to mention some of the “rumors” you’ve heard of hidden places in DC, full of “mystery” and “wonder.”  When they inquire as to where these places are, say you’ve only heard rumor (and maybe, saw on a map just once) of places tourists never get to see-places only referred to “NorthEast” and “SouthEast”…or was it “SouthWest”, you can’t really remember.  (And let’s face it, most of NE and SE are hidden, mysterious places for tourists despite some of the neat things they offer).

4.) When a Fan-Tourist (Foorist?) tells you something that is clearly wrong or made up from the novel, but wants to pass it off as half truth, say “pfft.  That’s not how it happened in National Treasure.”  If they press you that National Treasure was “just a movie”, well, I think you can figure out what to do from there.  (Side Note:  Why didn’t National Treasure create this kind of fervor?  Those movies were pretty fun!)

5.) Get some sidewalk chalk and just start writing stuff that sounds mysterious on the sidewalk like or “AOFACFSOA FSZWBEIC EIOA ZOHSFWQWOA OQQSDW” other things from the book’s twitter page. (note:  that might actually be illegal or considered defacing property-so be warned).

6.)  Introduce them to the people still in line at Five Guy’s and Ray’s Hell Burger from when President Obama went there.  Have them exchange stories of obsessiveness.

7.) Tell them “Walk left, Stand Right.”  Nothing to do with the book, but they are likely to be tourists.

Other suggestions?

The first and biggest is COMMENTS! Registration is no longer required to post a comment on any post. Of course if you already have an account you can still login to ensure your comments are attributed to you, but those who don’t can now post a comment without any long term commitment. Also, on the right you can see some of the recent comments so you’ll always know what the active discussions are. This was the most requested thing we’ve heard from people since our last redesign and we’re excited to see where it leads.

The next change is also something that was heavily requested, and that is a change to the ADS on the sites. You’ll immediately notice fewer of them, but what might not be as obvious is those smaller square ones to the right are specific to this city only and are being sold for a flat rate for a period of time rather than a confusing CPM/traffic/network model. Depending on the city, these range from $7-$175 for a full week. If you purchase one, during that time your ad will be the only one in that spot and will show on every page. We set these up both to make it easier for smaller local businesses to get their ads on our site, and also to help us bring in ads that relate better to our local audiences. Also, keeping these sites online is expensive and every little bit helps.

There are a bunch of other things we changed but we’ll leave those to you to investigate and take advantage of. Hope you like it, and we look forward to seeing you in the comments!!

Love,
The folks at MBHQ

Slam Dunk Showdown in LA

While you may not be seeing anymore slam dunks from Etan Thomas,  this weekend you could have a chance to become a slam dunk champion. The NBA’s Sprite Slam Dunk Showdown comes rolling into town this Saturday and will be setting up a b-ball court on Pennsylvania Ave between 9th and 10th street.

The showdown is also part of the National Capital Barbecue Battle that will be going on in the area as well, so you can see some slam dunks or try out some BBQ ribs.

The showdown starts at 4 PM and admission will be $10, the champion will be voted by you, the fans via SMS text messages. NBA Legend Darryl Dawkins will also be on hand as well.

You know after watching More Than A Game last week, I maybe inclined to see what a 5′11″ Asian man could do- however I don’t think I have that big of a vertical leap.

Easter Eggs*

Washingtonian magazine tweets:

Wow, people are super angry about this online White House easter egg roll distribution

And they aren’t kidding.  The newfangled intertubes version of signing up for Easter Egg Roll tickets seems to be universally reviled by Washingtonian readers commenting on the ticketing system.  They complain about system crashes and site errors, with the general sentiment being “at least when I stood in line, it kind of sucked but I knew what my chances were.”  Commenters on washingtonpost.com are expressing their frustration, along with a dollop of suspicion and a dash of “politics-as-usual”.  I think it’s safe to say we could hard-boil a dozen eggs for coloring with all the steam coming out of their ears!

How about it, DC?  Have you tried it?  Were you feeling trepidation because of the Purple Tunnel of Doom, or Ticketmaster≠Ticketsnow issues?   Is it E-Bay or nothing for you?  Or are you psyched because you didn’t have to stand outside in the rain on this yucky March morning?

* Photo by flickr user mistaric used under a Creative Commons license

I heard on MSNBC today that the D.C. council has passed “emergency legislation” that will allow bars, restaurants, and nightclubs to serve alcohol to 5 A.M. The legislation will also allow these places to stay open starting Saturday January 17th until the morning after the big day- January 20th.

Personally I am very excited over the news. Councilmen that voted against in the 9-4 decision cited a suspicion that many will be drunk at 5 A.M.- and I fully agree. I do suspect that many will now be partying all night long, and I intend to be one of them.

The move clearly benefits these establishments which can now generate revue for a longer period of time, however it is a wise move to try and accommodate the big inflow of tourists that will be in town that weekend.

While I personally still don’t know how I will ring in the new President, the increased hours have enticed me to make it a weekend I won’t forget… or maybe remember…

What do you think about the new law? Good move? Bad move? Great move?

In three days the National Museum of American History reopens to the general public. I was fortunate to tour the renovated building yesterday.

The first thing I notice as I step through the Mall entrance of the American History Museum is how light it is. A skylight brightens the three story atrium and the artifacts, like a home computer circa 1985, that line the walls in 10 ft. cases. A grand staircase constructed of metal and glass connects the first and second floors.

As I walk into the Selin Welcome Center, videos preview some of the events and special exhibits on the four flat screens as helpful volunteers provide maps and membership information.

Armed with a detailed floor map, my first stop was the new state-of-the-art home of the Star Spangled Banner. The line formed quickly, so I can imagine there will be long waits to see the flag. A narrow hall to the right leads to the viewing gallery. Information on the burning of DC by the British in 1814 include a charred remain from the White House and audio reenactments of the city consumed in flames. Signs encourage visitors to touch objects on display. The lights get dimmer and dimmer until the flag comes to view. In the far left corner, there is an interactive board where your hand becomes the computer mouse. Tap on hollow circles to open files of information about the restoration of the Star Spangled Banner. The exit features the history of our national anthem and Francis Scott Key’s inspiration for the lyrics.

Each floor of each wing will feature a landmark object that highlights the theme of the exhibits. These large artifacts include the George Washington’s Statue, the Greensboro lunch counter, a Dumbo ride car from Disneyland, the Vassar telescope, the Clara Barton Red Cross ambulance and the John Bull locomotive. Since the museum is so large and expansive, these objects will come in handy when making plans to meet up people. They’re impossible to miss.

While many of the all-time favorite items will be back on display — like Kermit the Frog, Dorothy’s ruby slippers, and Julia Child’s kitchen — there are plenty of new exhibits. One of my favorites is the hands-on science lab, Spark!Lab.

So don’t miss the Grand Opening events!

November 20: 5 – 10:00 pm Monumental Projection: Illuminating American History
* Photos will be projected onto the four stories of the National Museum of American History. The theme of the images is “twilight’s last gleaming.”  This outdoor photo light show repeats on November 21 – 22.

November 21: 8:30 – 10 am Ribbon Cutting Ceremony
* In additional to musical performances, entertainment will include a 20-minute aerial demonstration by the U.S. Army’s Golden Knights Parachute Team, the firing of an authentic War of 1812 cannon and a reading of the Gettysburg Address.

November 21 – 23 10 am – 7 pm Grand Reopening Festival
* Several stages will feature jazz, blues, Latin, and 19th century string band music. Take your photo with Dorothy of the Wizard of Oz, George Washington, and other historical characters.

The first 1,814 visitors through the museum doors will receive a special gift in honor of 1814, the year of the Battle of Baltimore when the Star-Spangled Banner waving at “dawn’s early light” inspired Francis Scott Key. The old favorites like the American Presidency, Julia Child’s kitchen, Muhammad Ali’s boxing gloves, and America on the move will return on display with a new state-of-the-art gallery for the Star-Spangled Banner.

The museum closed in 2006 for an extensive $85 million renovation. The new interior features a skylit atrium and a grand staircase of metal and glass that connects the first and second floors. Artifact walls on the first and second floors will showcase some of the 3 million objects in the museum’s permanent collection.

So don’t miss the official ribbon cutting and plan to drop by between 10:00 am – 7:30 pm for the festivities.

There is a catch however- you have to sing happy birthday to the museum.

Call me spoiled from all of DC’s free museums but I am not a big fan of the expensive prices of some of the other museums here and I will definitely take advantage of this deal while it lasts (it ends Saturday.)

Now time to find someone that can actually go out during the museum’s tourist (but not local resident) friendly hours.

As a native Western New Yorker, both hungry for wings and willing to donate to a good cause, I felt uniquely qualified to show up at this event and cast my own judgment on these so called “Buffalo Wings.”  Yes much like the native of Philly who is fond of saying ”that’s not a real cheese steak”, the Chicago transplant who says “ugh! you call this pizza?” and the New York City tourist that can’t wait to tell you just how much ”better the <fill in just about anything> is in New York”-I too become a food snob when wings are brought into the mix.   Especially when someone calls them “Buffalo Wings.”   

So on this, the alleged anniversary of the Buffalo Wing (Happy 44^th!) allow me to share my thoughts with you:

Old Glory showed off their BBQ skills via the chicken wing-their classic wings literally fell of the bone with an almost “smoked” flavor to them. Their signature wings took the Buffalo bitter flavor and mixed it with their own BBQ sauce that was truly awe inspiring-winning both of those rounds. 

J Paul’s went for a much lighter approach.  Their classic wings were the most “Buffalo” tasting of the group-but it was so incredibly light it was almost as if you were just remembering the taste rather than tasting it.  My only thought was “go strong or go home.”  The Signature wings, however, were a tremendous step up.  Jerk Chicken with Mango which, contrary to the actual judging panel, I thought stole the show.   

Throw in a couple of couches, a bean bag toss game and a big screen TV to watch football on and the event was a lot of fun.

The only thing missing from the Buffalo Battle of Wings?  Actual Buffalo Wings.  Yes, as good as these wings all were and as many as I ate (and I ate a LOT) not one of them actually passed the “I would call this a Buffalo Wing” test.  Much the way cupcakes can be great without being birthday cake or a hamburger can taste great without it being a steak-these wings, despite their awesomeness, just weren’t descendents of the original Bellisimo family recipe.

Washington DC is great because it creates an opportunity to share the best parts of this country with people from all over in one place.  So next year (and I hope they do this again next year) it would be great to open this up to more restaurants and make at least one of the rounds about being the best “Buffalo Wing.”  There are plenty of area restaurants and bars that, in my humble opinion, get it right.  More restaurants=more wings and more people which should, in turn, mean more money for DC Central kitchen and more fun.  Can’t argue with that logic!

Any thoughts DC?  What makes a good wing, or where to get one?   I’m partial to Garrett’s, Clydes and 51^st State myself.  Do you have a favorite regional food you’d like to see a competition for?  Comments, as always, are welcome-particularly when they come with a side of blue cheese. 

You’ve probably noticed it even if you aren’t conscious of it directly.  Iron Man (on DVD as of yesterday) was the biggest movie of the year by far (edit: at the time).  Then The Dark Knight came along (edit:  which then become the biggest movie of the year).  In between Hellboy II and Wanted both came out and this book Watchmen on the best seller’s table at Borders.  Make no doubt about it my friend-comics are coming out of the long boxes in our basements and into the mainstream-so you better get hip and quick.

In your quest for comic book literacy there is only one thing better than going to your local shop and asking for a copy of Sandman or Maus:  Discovering the next great episode of graphic literature of course!  The place to do that just happens to be in our own backyard of Bethesda at the Small Press Expo.  This Saturday and Sunday the best and brightest of the comics newest and/or Indie talents will be on hand to sell you comics and sign your stuff.  I’ve gone to SPX a few times over my six year stay here and it is a great event for fans and non-fans alike.  Very often creators are happy to just talk with you for a while, sign books that you buy and give you deals if you buy a few (hey these guys are out there making a name for themselves!).  Also a great way to disabuse yourself of the notions that “comics are for kids” and “comics are all about super-heroes.”  They aren’t-and nowhere is that better done than in the small press. 

I’ll be there Saturday (super-geek that I am) so be on the lookout…for a bunch of people more famous, creative and important than I am that is!  You’ll almost certainly walk away with something you’ll enjoy reading and might even have a “Oh her? Yeah I met her back at SPX 2008″ story to go with it some day!

Beer-That is all you need to know

If comics are not your speed (or even if they are-Saturday is a long day) The Commonwealth (particularly Shirlington) will play host to “Oktoberfest” hosted by Cap City.  After I’ve loaded up on comic books I plan on heading back across the river to get…well…loaded.  Responsibly of course!  For a mere $25 you’ll have access to over 30 local breweries and their 4 oz beer samples.  That’s 120 oz of beer for $25 (if you only go to each tent once that is!) also known as a deal.  If you don’t drink the event is free and there will be music and food available for all-so it might be worth stopping by anyway. 

I again will be there and will eventually be the guy either sitting down reading comic books trying not to spill beer on them OR the guy getting into a loud angry discussion about which of Earth’s Green Lanterns was actually the coolest. 

Author’s note:  If you do decide to go to both places you might want to do comics first only because impulse shopping goes up when you’ve been drinking and it’s much safer (and far more legal) to drive having bought too many comics then it is to drive having drank too many beers.