Is it seriously summer already? Hold on, let me Google that. Oh hey! It’s not.

Could have fooled me though. This is August weather. In June. What kind of cruel joke is Mother Nature trying to play on us?

This reminds me of the weather we had in ‘Nam during the war. I remember it like it was yesterday. The swift boat dropped John Kerry and I off on the banks of the Poo Nahnee river and we had to cut our way through the humidity with our machetes. We had to tie rolls of Bounty to our heads to mop up the constant stream of sweat. We got heat stroke so many times that our reality was more like a dreamworld than our dreamworld was. Hah - one time when we were crossing the Moo Goo Gai Pan river under sniper fire, John tried to windsurf across on a crocodile. Silly ivy leaguer. I came to his rescue and beat the bajeezus out of that croc with the butt of my gun, but lost it along with three fingers and a buttock in the process. I had to retrofit a potato gun I’d bought at Wall Drug on a family vacation into a tofu gun. Now you know why I’ll never be a vegan.

I’ve had enough already! I want my dry, 75 degree days back. I want to be able to open my windows at night. I don’t want to have to take three showers every day. I don’t want to have to run my air conditioner around the clock. I don’t want my jeans to stick to me when I go out at night.

Go away, Summer.

As we were coming home from the Lewis Black show on Friday night, this was the ad on the Orange Line train back to Clarendon. I appreciate that being vegan will allow you to play with chickens, or something. Those folks I know who participate in farmers’ markets and CSA will frequently be able to go observe the chickens in their habitat.

So, I’m not sure that going vegan will really help the chickens anymore than, say, buying your eggs and chicken from a local farm who treat their chickens right.

But really, this whole entry is an excuse for the headline. Put your alternate headlines in the comments.

Stroke that cock, Vegan! — Originally uploaded by tbridge

To my surprise, DC has an extant, long lasting infoshop!

That may not ring any bells among those of you who didn’t go to college with a bunch of radical anarchists who shouted “fuck the police!” and “smash the state!” Frankly, it’s not part of my world anymore either–once I left college, I slowly drifted away from punks and DIYers who created their own zines and would wheat-paste fliers on walls around town after dark.

I’m not sure what an infoshop is technically meant to be, but the one I hung around in Berkeley, CA was a place where you could stay all day, reading books about ending speciesism or acting up against the military-industrial complex, and then have a meal of second-hand brown bread and vegan soup. And where the shelves were packed with homemade zines about folks’ adventures and thoughts. Kinda like paper blogs. No, make that just like paper blogs.

I’m not making fun of these places. It’s the greatest thing when people’s ideals push them to actually do something rather than just talk about it. It’s just such a walk down memory lane for me, though, that I have to laugh.

So DC’s infoshop is exactly like the one in Berkelely, only smaller. And the people are friendlier! And there are signs on the wall urging support for activists who are now in jail. I don’t remember that from my college years.

Technically this infoshop is called the Brian Mackenzie Infoshop, after a local activist who died while trying to make the place a reality.

Go check it out; smile and the folks there will smile back. It’s in the middle of nowhere, 1426 9th st NW (by P, I think) and it’s generally open noon-9pm Weds-Sun. Call at 202-986-0681 if you want to be sure they’re there before you come.

Wayan’s DC Photos

Today there was a brutal attack on the 1400 block of P Street NW.

An innocent recycled glass jar of vegan, Fair Trade, organic, heirloom tomato salsa was smashed against cold, unforgiving concrete.

A cry was heard from the scene - bystanders thought it was either the anguish of the rehabilitated child soldier subsistence farming cooperative that hand-crafted the salsa.

Or the socially conscious, environmentally aware, enlightened consumer who just lost $12.99 + tax to the mean streets of Washington DC.

My salivary glands are usually on overload when I wander around a Whole Foods, or what others refer to as “Whole Paycheck”. That’s not to say I’m slobbering on their fresh ears of corn in the summer or drooling on their humanely raised meat display case, but compared to places such as Safeway, it’s like a little grocery oasis in the city.

That is until I stumbled upon this little goody: “Meatless Nuggets”.

I’m all for those who choose to be vegetarian or vegan, whether they do so because they’re against animal cruelty, against polluting our environment, or just because they think it’s a healthier lifestyle. But do you have to name your food items with such strange names like “meatless nuggets”, “Tofurkey”, or “egg replacer”? It’s like us carnivores coming up with food names like “sinewy stew”, “meaty morsels”, or “SPAM”.

Just out of curiosity, can someone tell me what a “meatless nugget” consists of?

Maybe my expectations were too high? You know the drill. You’re tired of the same old restaurants in your hood and when you hear a new one will be opening you think, “Nice! Can’t wait to try it! Maybe it’ll be good?” But in the back of your mind you prepare yourself to be disappointed because 3 of the last 5 new restaurants have been bad, and one of them was only so-so.

I guess Plum Blossom, located at 18th & Willard falls into the so-so category as I wasn’t impressed and am in no hurry to go back.

The decor? Very Ikea-ish. No paintings or photos on the wall, very drab, yellow lighting, and the little tables you sit at are made of Formica (would have been so much nicer if they were wood). As a tall guy I had trouble sitting on the tiny cube seats that are less than two feet off the ground, but that wasn’t a big deal.

The service? Well, it’s a new restaurant so you have to expect some jitters. Our waiter didn’t exactly know when to take empty dishes or glasses away and kept brushing up against me when he did so. I asked him what kind of beer they had (hoping for an Asahi or a Sapporo) and he said the list was on the menu. Whoops! No it wasn’t. They only have Amstel Light (like ’sex on a boat’), Miller Light, and Heineken. Their wine list was pretty slim too. Overall the service was pretty decent but nothing to get excited about.

The food? Ah, the food. What really makes a restaurant worth its weight in soy sauce. I thought the sushi tasted good and wasn’t chewy or fishy tasting, but the pieces were cut too thick ($6 for two pieces). I ordered the small plate of Vienamese Beef ($10) and found it to be chewy and not very flavorful. Good thing I had my handy dish of soy sauce nearby to flavor it up. My friends weren’t very impressed with their dishes either, but one of them is always disappointed since she’s a vegan.

The good thing about my experience at Plum Blossom was the plethora of attractive women there, no doubt due to the feature on Daily Candy (does every woman in town get those e-mails?).

So if you feel like sushi and want to try some place new, go for it. If not, you won’t be missing out. Stick to Sushi Taro or better yet go to Oya.

If you’re not yet familiar with the concept of churrascaria, you are likely a vegan, or perhaps someone who’s been living under a rock for the last ten years. It’s a Brazilian-style barbeque feast, featuring what can only be described as a festival of meat. As it’s been implemented in the States by groups like Texas de Brazil and Fogo de Chão, gaúchos dressed in traditional garb bring you meat after meat after meat after meat after meat until you inadvertently explode, or you turn over the serving dot on your table.

The serving dot is a bit of an interesting phenomenon for a restaurant. When you’re seated, each person at the table is issued a serving dot, one side is red, one side is green. Flipping the dot results in a stampede of gaúchos bringing you everything from sausage to leg of lamb to filet mignon wrapped in bacon. It’s all carved directly from a long skewer to your plate, by every passing gaúcho. Of course, there’s also a salad bar, so if you’re not doing Atkins, you can get a huge salad, or maybe some caprese or some soup, or even possibly some seared ahi tuna. Prepare yourself, though, when you flip that dot over, as the gaúchos will come without ceasing until you flip that dot again. Remember, also, that everything is coated in rock-salt before it’s roasted, in the traditional brazilian style. This results in steak and pork that’s phenomenal, but lamb that loses its subtlety.

We had a great time at Texas de Brazil out in Fairfax, and though the bill was a little high for just two, I don’t think I’ll need to eat again for at least three or four days. Oh, and remember to have the crème de papaya. It’s fantastic.

Texas de Brazil (warning, website has sound)
11750 Fair Oaks Shopping Center
Fairfax, VA

photo courtesy of Jamba Juice

Or would that be their dairy non-dairy?

This may end up being more a national story, but since it’s been made brutally clear that we have a few strident vegan readers here I thought it was worth mentioning. If you go to one of the DC area’s four Jamba Juice locations and ask for their non-dairy blend thinking you’re not consuming cow’s milk…. you’re mistaken. Like the Consumerist writer, I don’t know if this process addresses the problems of people who have lactose consumption issues but if you’re abstaining for moral reasons this for sure doesn’t make the grade - it’s got dried milk in the ingredients and I’m pretty sure the only way you get that is by milking a mammal.

Photo by WashPost

I want to hunt deer. I want to get all camouflage early in the morning and hunt Bambi and his parents. I want to strike down another living being with death I unleash at my will.

Regular readers may be shocked that I, the most anti-gun guy, would want to kill. But I do. I want to hunt my own meat. Kill my dinner. And have fresh venison in my freezer.

Why? How could an ex-vegetarian, ex-vegan, even, have such a change of heart? I ask you how any self-respecting omnivore cannot want to dine on her own rewards? At least you have control over your meal - it’s not raised on chemicals, slaughtered in a factory and shipped to Safeway in plastic wrap.

Add to it, the local deer population that is so overrunning the Capitol , Georgetown retailers, suburban roads, Montgomery County wants to put does on the “the pill”.

Now, make no mistake, I have no desire to save a dying tradition. There will be no high-powered rifles, no morning meet-up at the gun club, not even a pick-up truck.

I want to hunt deer differently. With bow and arrow, spear, or even a few friends and a cliff, I’ll take it old school and back to basics. Make hunting a team sport, a tough sport, and real victory when you kill.

That’s how I would hunt Odocoileus virginianus, with respect, determination, and a much higher failure rate than good-ole boys with shotguns and M-16’s. I would also want to hunt in Rock Creek Park. Make it local - both in the kill and in the meal.

Anyone else interested?

Since Takoma Park is known for its food Co-ops and Vegetarian/Vegan restaurants, it’s only natural that they would have a Farmers Market. Located on Laurel Ave. at Carroll (map), the market is held every Sunday year round, although you are better off visiting spring through fall. Featuring fresh, locally produced fruit, vegetables, baked goods, meat, and eggs, if you’re used to paying Whole Foods prices for such items you’re in for a pleasant surprise. Happy, healthy eating!

Related Post: Vegan in DC.