Real World DC: Episode 5 Breakdown
What is it about fame that makes you unable to hold down a relationship?
We’ve seen many Hollywood marriages go down in flames, many Hollywood romances fizzle before the tabloids get their fair share of pasting them on magazine covers- so what is it about attracting a lot of attention that spells bad things for relationships?
I don’t really know the answer but I do know one thing: never go on a reality show with a girlfriend, especially The Real World.
Ty and Mike were smart in ending their relationships before moving into the house, Erika and Josh however… well what was the over/under on episodes before Josh or Erika would cheat on their partners?
Drama In DC
Emily And Ty Start To Get Annoying (Well At Least To Me)
The show started off with lots of talk on the Emily-Ty relationship… or maybe as Dane Cook calls it, a relation-shit.
I get it guys, you love hooking up and love the fact you guys aren’t attached emotionally. It’s the ultimate situation right? (Well maybe it’s not The Situation but still…) You don’t need to constantly feed us confessionals and asides about how cool it is they hate relationships but are hooking up…
However things don’t go so well when Ty starts to come off more girly than Emily- dropping the “L word” on her in the bar.
Now I don’t know if Ty really is a softy deep down, or if he thinks using the L word will get him laid- problem is he has to remember he’s not dealing with any ordinary girl. Emily probably has bigger balls that Ty right now- and proud of it!
She loves commitment just as much as the next stereotypical guy, and has cooled off after that awkward exchange in the bar.
So does this mean Emily and Ty are over? I say no- I can see this pushing and pulling between the two to last long enough to make us wish MTV had better story lines.
By the way, can the cast stop spying on them? Ashley is once again caught spying on her roommates, and Erika and Callie join in later in the episode. What is it about roommates hooking up that makes people want to watch?
Rule #1: You don’t fall in love at The Jersey Shore The Real World House
Teasers from last week revealed Josh would be infidelitous soon, too bad that’s going to be his first real storyline on the show.
Josh and his girlfriend, Ashley Marconi, are talking on the phone, being all mushy, so far so good.
Next thing though, the house gets a phone call (can you really call The Real World house?) Josh’s mother, gives him the tip that his girl maybe “running around with other guys.” Man I wish my mom actually used cool lingo like that.
Cut to Josh and Ashley yelling on the phone. For a minute there I actually thought I was watching The Jersey Shore for a minute, something about phone arguments and tattoo just got me confused (Josh wasn’t talking on a duck phone right?)
So Josh deals with the girlfriend news the only way he can- with pain… and nose rings…
I was surprised he hadn’t gotten his nose pierce before I just assumed it was amongst all the other body mods he’s got going on. After he gets the work done he’s back at home saying how he actually doubts Ashley really cheated on him and says, “She’s going to be there for me and I know I’m probably going to be there for her.”
Emphasis on the probably. You know it’s not going to end well if you say “probably going to be there”.
Ashley visits from Philly and have lovey-dovey, burger sharing, moments. When she leaves I witness the worst staged goodbye kiss ever.
As she waits for the bus to leave Josh runs on, asks the driver for two seconds, and locks lips with his girl. The kind of spontaneous moment that would of been genuine if the camera was already on the bus waiting for Josh to run in.
So how does Josh deal with his girl now out of town? Hitting up Tattoo bar and dancing with DC socialite and blogger Kelly Ann Collins. The two go back to the house where Emily catches them making out and handles it in a very mature fashion:
“OMG They are making out! They are making out! The are making out! OMG!”
Well played Em. Also well played Josh- the 35-year old Collins could be considered a Cougar snag but the blogger’s attraction to famous people and cameras probably helped him out a bit. I’d like to see you get within 10-feet of her if you were just an ordinary person.
The only downside of making out with hot bloggers? It’s eventually going to end up on The Internet. It also doesn’t help when this is the daily routine for your girlfriend when you are away
Taken from Ashley’s blog:
Let’s face it, the whole time Josh was away I was a complete mess! For a whole month, I don’t even think I moved off the couch.
I had the same routine everyday:
1) wake up & shower (brush teeth etc.)
2) eat, that’s if I had an appetite
3) stalk his life
4) wait for a phone call
That explains why Ashley quickly found out and was furious at Josh the next day.
Another couple in dire straights- thanks to MTV!
The Girls Sing, Drink, and Be Merry
Erika also gets some more face time this week, she lands a chance to sing on stage with The Cab, a band she respects not because of their record sales, but more because she has them on her iPod. I have a lot of music on my iPod- I can’t say I respect every artist I put on there. Good thing Erika is more judgmental with the music she has on her iTunes. I often whore my iPod out to the likes of Kelly Clarkson or Justin Timberlake- I mean girls like that stuff right?
In other news, girls do two things when they are drunk: drunk dial boys & cry. Callie has did both these things this week.
Mike on short people: “She’s like a real person but smaller- like pocket size.”
Yes I know she is still a ticking time bomb, but she managed to get the face time she deserves without causing drama. Of course I still think that’s to come.
I understand her reasons for drunk dialing, as pointed out by Emily, so I give her a pat on the back and say, “I’ve been there.”
Emily & Ty
If only the two were really over so I can move on…
How can I not look down on you after cheating on Ashley? However I will say the way the two fight makes me believe they are just a couple that’s always been arguing and cheating on each other. It’s probably the way the two work out as a couple in some weird way.
Look I Know That Place!
Earth Treks Climbing Center: Located in Rockville, Columbia, and Timonium; looks like the crew actually ventured into MD to scale some walls.
Jinx Proof Tattoo and Piercing: Where Josh goes for pain.
Lucky Bar: I enjoy Lucky Bar for happy hours, less for actual going out at night.
Tattoo Bar: The bar is so rock & roll, just like Josh. Also the place where he meets Kelly Ann Collins and where the two held their RWDC premiere party. Looking at some of the photos the two still look close.
9:30 Club: DC’s premiere music club.
Buca di Beppo: Where does Josh take his lady? To the finest Italian chain restaurant in DC! At least it’s not Olive Garden.
Shady Bus Terminal: For those that know where the bus terminal is in NE, you have to admit that it’s not in the nicest part of town. I myself had a shady encounter just walking past it.
Rhino Bar: Where everybody is a douchebag and we know Callie hates d’bags.
McFadden’s: DC’s college bar. Love the open bar promotions, hate the watered down drinks.
MTV fails at setting up Josh’s relationship with Ashley as all kisses and hugs. How does Josh go from being angry at his cheating girl to saying how much he loves his, “little ball of fire?” Next thing you know they are sharing burgers in the kitchen but once she leaves he’s out making out with bloggers.
No relationship is totally perfect and even though Josh cheated on his girlfriend, I didn’t believe it was a violation of something that was truly pure to begin with. Looking at the Real World Dailies- I think I rest my case.