The D.C. Council decided on Tuesday ^[1] that in order to make up for a $35 million budget shortfall they would increase the tax on cigarettes by $1, bringing it up to $2/pack. That will put us in a tie ^[2] with Arizona, Alaska, Connecticut, Maine, Maryland, and Michigan for one of the highest “state” tax rates on cigarettes. Oh right, we’re not a state. We just pay an exorbitant amount of taxes. How easily I forget such silly things.

So what is the Council’s message here? My only guess is this:

People who smoke are evil. It’s a disgusting habit that’s bad for your health. Maybe if we charge you an extra dollar per pack of those devil sticks, you’ll quit smoking and live a healthy lifestyle like the rest of us. Maybe you’ll even start participating in triathlons like our super healthy mayor does. Die smokers, die!

Of course I could be missing something. I think they should also put a tax on ice cream, donuts, frappacinos with extra whipped cream, pizza, cheeseburgers, chili dogs, chili cheese fries, fettuccine alfredo, and mac ‘n cheese. If you eat enough of those things, you’ll die over time too.