Valentine’s Madness, Day One

Expensive Roses

Yep, all the florists are in on it. They know you need to buy roses to keep from sleeping in the doghouse on Valentine’s Day. Come on – $65 for a box of a dozen roses that will end up in my compost bin after a few days? I seriously doubt the lasting effects of a box of roses. Call me unromantic, but to me a whole rose bush, three of which are on the way to my home right now, is even better because it produces roses one after another, giving glorious blooms like they were penny candy. Yet a whole rose bush isn’t a romantic gift.

I once dated a woman who said that she would be really happy if I got her a dozen roses or else a single rose, but that half a dozen wasn’t romantic at all. Neither was two dozen. A whole room full of them and you are back to romantic. I never understood this logic but other women have confirmed its validity.

All this leaves me confused about the nature of romantic gifts. Things that show care, such as road flares, reflective vests or a good pair of shoe insoles aren’t romantic, even though they would last longer than cut flowers or candy. Flowers and candy really have the message of zooming to the express lane to get in someone’s pants, yet they are the traditional romantic gifts.

What are you getting your sweetie for Valentine’s Day? What does it mean to you?

5 Comments so far

  1. Max (unregistered) on February 12th, 2008 @ 1:17 pm

    I’d like to send some black roses to some of the girls I’ve dated in the past. This year I’ll be giving my dog a new squeaky chew toy for Valentine’s Day. She’ll love me forever.

  2. Leerie (unregistered) on February 12th, 2008 @ 5:18 pm

    I can understand the logic behind the varying levels of romance in different numbers of roses, but I personally prefer potted plants to cut flowers. I’m only one girl, though, and I’m a bit odd. (Also if faced with an entire room full of roses my thought would honestly be, "Who’s going to clean this up?")

    Road flares and shoe insoles -only- show true caring if she’s actually expressed a need for them. It isn’t romantic if it’s simply showing protectiveness, it has to show that you’ve been really listening.

    I think, though, that those kind of gifts where it’s something she needs are a lot better than flowers and candy that you picked up simply for the sake of giving her flowers and candy, if you see what I mean. I mean where it’s just like, it’s Valentine’s, I must get her roses. If it’s like, it’s Valentine’s, I’ll get her her -favorite- flower and that kind of candy she really loves, then that’s far more romantic.

  3. Jenn L (unregistered) on February 12th, 2008 @ 5:50 pm

    I usually rustle up a quiet candlelit dinner at home. We used to go out but it’s way too much like amateur night for lovers. Everyone has this panicked expression. So much pressure!

    Putting a price or a quantity or specificity on what’s "romantic" makes it unromantic. Like those women who say things like "it isn’t love if it’s under three carats." Blech.

    The truly romantic things that have happened in my life… have had nothing to do with Hallmark.

  4. Carl Weaver (unregistered) on February 12th, 2008 @ 10:04 pm

    But Jenn, people use Hallmark when they care to send the very best!

  5. poetryman69 (unregistered) on February 13th, 2008 @ 7:45 am

    "Triggering the Grand Irrationality?"

    Cowering in an obscure corner of the food pyramid

    somewhere between the tofu and the unflavored yogurt

    contemplating the juxtaposition of intangibles for all you are worth…..

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