Kz’s House of Talent Suckfest

On a Scale of Zero to Sucktacular, I would put Kz’s House of Talent near the top of that scale. Their “comedy contest” tonight at Floyd’s (the best description of Floyd’s is that it’s a TGI Fridays that’s had its soul sucked out) was the single biggest entertainment lie I’ve been told since they tried to pass off Baltimore as DC in this summer’s Die Hard. I was expecting a great slate of comedians. I didn’t make it past the Emcee.

For my $10, I got the world’s worst DJ, a sound system that didn’t work, strobe lights that made me wonder if we were in a bad rave, and two R&B “acts” that could only charitably told to find day jobs and keep them. I felt really bad for the “opener” on the night, Mike Blejer, who was really quite funny, when the crowd could hear him. Sadly, the guys running the sound system were either deaf or unable to notice that the entire crowd at Floyd’s was asking them to turn it up. The representative for KZ’s House of “Talent” foisted her acts on us without warning, despite the event being advertised as a comedy night. They were so bad, I thought about going to the bathroom to hang myself, or using my fork to put holes in my eardrums.

Putting Blejer, who won the Improv’s Comedy Showcase in September, on in front of a dead crowd who couldn’t hear him was the first strike. The second strike was the really shitty R&B acts. I came to see comedy, not bad music in entertaining LED-blinking glasses. The third was the emcee. I understand that comedy is about laughs. I understand that not everything a comedian says on stage is true and actually fact. But that’s no reason to get up there and bag on your girlfriend for a good solid ten minutes. You don’t have to go right for the “my girlfriend so fat…” jokes.

That’s when I found out that my friend who was performing hadn’t been given a performance order, and had to pay part of the cover charge, that’s when we bailed. Don’t go to Kz’s events. You’ll just be annoyed that you spent money for nothing.

5 Comments so far

  1. dawn (unregistered) on October 25th, 2007 @ 9:54 pm

    That block of real estate just has bad ju-ju in general. Anything within proximity of my ex-employer must be destined to suck beyond compare. …

  2. WFY (unregistered) on October 26th, 2007 @ 9:33 am

    I believe that Floyd’s is run by the same guy who used to run Zig’s. If it is the same guy who ran Zig’s circa 2002, I’m not surprised it sucked. I have never seen such an obnoxious restaurant manager/proprietor as that guy was in 2002.

  3. Cathy Wood (unregistered) on November 9th, 2007 @ 5:23 pm

    Tom Bridge,

    My name is Cathy Wood the founder of Kz’s House Of Talent and I like to respond to your comments on the Kz’s show at Floyd’s Oct 25, 2007.

    First of all I like to bring it to your attention that I’m a single mother of three, I had an idea to help local talent in the DC Metro area to do what they love to do and that is performing. I started an organization from nothing into a show where local talent will have a platform where they can perform; that created jobs for some of the local talent and I think that’s a great opportunity for the community and local talent!

    What have you done for your community lately?

    Now to get to your comments!

    1) First thing you need to get you facts straight before you speak out and slander a business. I hope that you are not a writer or reporter!

    Fact – Floyd’s is not owned by the former Zigs and no way affiliated with Kz’s by any means.
    Fact – As the representative for Kz’s I did not foisted my acts on you! (read below).

    2) If you got pass the 2nd grade reading and comprehension level you would have read the BIG Sign outside the door at Floyd’s that read "Kz’s House Of Talent Comedy Contest and Show w/Live Entertainment" the same was on all flyers and ads for that show.

    3) If your friend wants her $5.00 back that she paid at the door I would gladly give her a refund so she can buy your crying ass a kids meal!

    4) Do you have a complex about fat girlfriends because I don’t understand why you are so concerned about my host of the show telling fat girlfriend jokes. Jay The Comedian happens to be a very funny comedian, he had the entire audiences in laughter the moment he walked on stage with his first sentence; that’s what talented comics do; make people laugh! (you have some issues you need to work out).

    4) And most importantly people came out to support the local talent; it was a full house and at the end of the night when the lights came on it was still a full house (so no one missed you) and I heard nothing but laughter from the audience throughout the show; so if you happy ass left early that’s on you, the rest of us had a barrel of laughter that night with some very funny comedians; maybe your friend was afraid to compete!

    5) If you like to put your mouth where your ass is I will give you stage time so you can show us what you got!!!

    See us at Floyd’s Dec 8th or if you have more to add please contact me at

  4. Tom Bridge (unregistered) on November 9th, 2007 @ 5:42 pm


    Thanks for taking the time to respond. Regarding Floyd’s/Zig’s, that’s WFY’s comment here. Please seek redress with him if you have a concern regarding his response.

    Concerning the "live entertainment", generally I recommend that your talent either be entertaining, or live and not memorex. Perhaps they can even be both! Wouldn’t that just put the butts in the seats? Woo! I was told it was a comedy contest. What I got were two acts that sucked.

    Concerning the cover charge you levied against my friend, perhaps you should not charge the people that want to ply their wares? They may be competing, but they’re putting money in YOUR pockets with all the people they bring with them. Treat them with a bit of respect, perhaps?

    Concerning Jay, I just didn’t like his brand of humor, that’s all. I’m allowed to have an opinion, aren’t I? He was offensive. Sometimes offensive is funny, and I’m not saying he shouldn’t be performing if people find him funny. I’m saying *I* didn’t find him funny.

    Concerning being "afraid to compete", catch her on stage at Magooby’s at the end of the month for their monthly talent contest. She left because YOU disrespected her as a performer, Cathy. That’s on YOU. Not me.

    And frankly? I’m not funny. I’m not a comedian. Run a talent contest for classically trained vocalists, and I’ll show folks my chops, though.

    Don’t go to Floyd’s For KZ’s. Not worth it.

  5. Don (unregistered) on November 10th, 2007 @ 2:26 pm

    Nothing says quality entertainment like a promoter who has to argue with you that, yes, you had a good time.

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