Be a Gentleman, Even on Metro

Thank you to this woman who reminds us guys to be mindful of where our eyes stray. It’s the time of year for spaghetti-strap things and midriff-exposing things, so fellas, I beg you on behalf of the women out there who are just trying to get from here to there: Quit gawking. Be a gentleman for crying out loud.

Inspired by this Craigslist MC:

Eyes up here, buddy – w4m – 28

You: Tall, lanky guy listening to iPod, staring at my breasts with a dazed look on your face.
Me: Slightly offended, slightly flattered.
Did we have a missed connection or were you the only one getting off on the red line?

Yes, I admit it. I love reading the missed connections. The thought of loves that may have been is a sad one, but the hope expressed in this part of CL is very inspiring. And now and then there is a moral story going on in the middle of it all, like this.

14 Comments so far

  1. pauper (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 9:44 am

    It’s hot out. If I want to stare at some boobies, I’m going to stare at some boobies.


  2. Carl Weaver (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 10:17 am

    The fact of excessive heat doesn’t give you permission to be a cad. Be polite, for Pete’s sake. I love boobies too but I try not to stare. In fact, thats a good argument for bringing a book – something to look at instead of boobs that simply makes you seem remote instead of predatory.


  3. Don (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 10:23 am

    I try to be courteous but if I have my iPod on there’s a good chance that’s not breast ogling, it’s the thousand yard stare.


  4. pauper (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 10:26 am

    Oh, so you make it seem like you’re reading when you’re actually looking at boobies? Weak. Be a man.

    And who the hell is Pete?


  5. Stacey (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 12:19 pm

    Carl, you’re a stand up guy.

    Women have an equal responsibility to not wear revealing clothing that is so revealing that it’s impossible NOT to stare. But responsibility lies on both ends.


  6. Carl Weaver (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 12:25 pm

    No, I make it look like I am reading when I am actually reading.

    I think Pauper has a strange sense of what it means to be a man. I am a man even though I respect women enough to try to make them feel comfortable in my presence.

    As for who Pete is, I am not sure. St. Peter? Pete Best? Pete Peterson and the Peteys?


  7. Anon (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 12:45 pm

    As an ass-man myself, it is virtually impossible for a woman to notice that I’m staring at her magnificant caboose.


  8. Carl Weaver (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 12:56 pm

    Good point, Stacey. This is one of those issues that is similar to the photography debate we had a while back. It is perfectly legal to stare at women (or men) in public. However, that is not an indicator that it is nice to do or the right thing to do, even though you have the right to do it.

    Think about this, guys – if your mother, girlfriend, wife, sister, etc. were on the train, what would you think of a guy who was undressing her with his eyes?

    I am not saying don’t do it. I think all men do this sometimes, but try to keep it to a minimum. Be conscious of where your eyes are. I have been like Don, zoning out and finding myself staring in the direction of someone, my brain not processing the visual signals.

    It is about intention. Put a yoke on your senses and train them to be polite and not wander so much. Or simply read a book. If your intention is to attract women, that will work better anyway, since chicks dig brainy guys like me. If your intention is to simply stare at women, that’s kind of an empty, brainless activity. Challenge yourself to reach higher!


  9. Wayan (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 1:32 pm

    Mmm… boobies


  10. Ex-Hy Hy (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 1:33 pm

    Don’t stare. Instead, stick a camera in their cleavage. Exercise your first amendment rights as a photographer! If they protest, be sure to kvetch about it on here.


  11. Pauper (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 1:58 pm

    I was kidding. We all look, but it should be done with some tact.


  12. poo poo (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 2:03 pm

    pauper! i can’t believe you’re advocating not only to look, but insinuating some sort of tactile approach as well?! shame on you! you must remove your mind from the gutter!


  13. Wayan (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 2:17 pm

    Pauper,

    Don’t deny it. You know you want to be a card-carrying boobie lover like me.


  14. Pauper (unregistered) on August 10th, 2007 @ 2:33 pm

    my mind will never EVER leave the gutter!!! NEVER!!!!

    And Wayan, what does one have to do to join your club? I’m up for anything.



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