Sorry Baltimore, it’s not you it’s me. I know you have a lot of good to offer but I think of you in a really bad way. It’s not a rival city thing or anything like that, it’s just that my own experiences with Charm City, like the time my friend there got mugged by someone who peppersprayed her in the face and walked away with her purse while she writhed in pain, have happened to leave me with a less-than-optimal impression.
So, as unfair as it is, when I hear something bad about DC my gut response is always: Well, at least it’s not Baltimore.
That’s why I found it extra hilarious last night when on the Daily Show I heard the following while Jon Stewart and Aasif Mandvi were discussing White House Press Secretary Tony Snow’s comparison of Baghdad’s violence to Washington, DC’s:
JON STEWART: “But that’s insane! Washington, DC is violent, but they’re not, you know, finding thirty to fifty corpses in the street every day.”
AASIF MANDVI: “Well, no, of course not. It’s not Baltimore.”
Video here, the second clip from the 5/10 show.
By the way, did you know that Baltimore’s current motto is, get this, “Baltimore: The Greatest City in America”? I’m not kidding, check out this excellent Christian Science Monitor piece about B’more’s slogan identity crisis. Though I admit DC’s motto, Justitia Omnibus (Justice for All) could use some jazzing up.