Who needs a blog when you’ve got a license plate?

when_vanity_plates_arent_enough.jpg
The endless flow of commuters traveling in and out of DC from neighboring Virginia – where a vanity plate only costs an extra $10 – provides for a pretty good amount of reading material on the roads. Sometimes, however, seven little letters just won’t suffice. That’s when you need foot-high letters that communicate your message. I doubt any of us understand what that message is, but we all saw it – possibly even from orbit.

Even though I can’t quite figure out the meaning here, this glittering abomination is still better than the plate I saw several years ago, which I’ll place below the fold for our more delicate readers.

disturbing_license_plate.jpgApparently this was obscure enough to get past the censors in 2002 when I saw it but it’s since been recalled – searching on the Virginia DMV website shows the plate as “not available” rather than “taken.” I’m not sure if I’m pleased or disappointed that this word has become well-known enough to trigger the obscenity filters at the DMV.

8 Comments so far

  1. wayan (unregistered) on November 29th, 2005 @ 5:39 pm

    Yo Don! Check you out, going from frequest poster to full-on writer. Unlike Unusual Candor, you seem brave enough to put your bytes on the line.

    And I love the line you started with. Nutting like a reference to kinky porn for your first post. Good on ya!


  2. Don (unregistered) on November 29th, 2005 @ 6:49 pm

    Thanks Wayan. After I saved the post it occured to me that I was surely setting some expectations with my first choice of subjects but what the hell, they may as well realize who they’re dealing with sooner than later.


  3. Tom Bridge (unregistered) on November 29th, 2005 @ 7:38 pm

    Outstanding. Now that’s one helluva license plate.


  4. Jenn L (unregistered) on November 29th, 2005 @ 8:51 pm

    Hysterical!

    And welcome, Don. Glad you’re on board.


  5. pun (unregistered) on November 29th, 2005 @ 8:58 pm

    Yep, your first post is a mouthfull


  6. Oracle (unregistered) on November 30th, 2005 @ 9:27 am

    If I had to guess, I’d posit that the foot-high message translates to something along the lines of:

    “While you (my EX-husband) are living in a lousy basement apartment, I’m using the monthly check you are forced to send me to buy nice things like this (dented) Ford EXpedition.”


  7. Don (unregistered) on November 30th, 2005 @ 10:38 am

    Yeah, but it could as easily be that the spouse who had to hand over the EX slapped that on it. It’s hard to parse if it’s misplaced gloating or a vehicular version of paying your $50 fine in pennies frozen in a block of ice.

    The sentiment of the Bukkake Camaro is a little easier to comprehend, though why someone would want to tell the world about their particular taste is equally unknowable.


  8. Stacey (unregistered) on November 30th, 2005 @ 12:40 pm

    I used to work in Old Town and park on the street, usually behind one of our neighbors. His license plate read “ENDOWD.” Ew. One day nearing the end of my time with that organization, I saw him getting in his car, ran (yes, literally) outside and yelled from the front door, “Hey! Why do you have that on your license plate?!?” (I get fearless at really inopportune times, according to friends.) He laughed and said “well, dear, I’m an accountant… why, what did your dirty little mind think?” with a grody smirk. He was a skinny little 50 year old who at that moment qualified as totally creepy.



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