We Salute You, Mr. Lean Up Against The Metro Pole Man

We know it’s tough to ride the Metro when there are no seats available, so today, we salute you, Mr. Lean Up Against the Metro Pole Man! After a long day on the job, the last thing you want to do is ride the Metro, but there you stand, your tall form pressed against that pole as you hold on to the upper bar. Though others seek to brace themselves with their hands, you pay them no heed as your buttocks clench tighter around that pole (do they ever Lysol those?). As we pull into the station and still more patrons board the train, your gluteal grasp on that pole grows no looser. And for that, we salute you, Mr. Lean Up Against the Metro Pole Man. Well Done.

3 Comments so far

  1. Stacey (unregistered) on November 10th, 2005 @ 9:41 am

    Dying. Just dying – freaking HILARIOUS. I practically shut down our entire office a few months ago when a friend sent me the audio links to all of the “Great American Hero” radio ad spots – I was crying.

    Good work Tom, this was hilarious, and I know JUST the guy you’re talking about…

    Word to the wise: Always use hand wipes after Metro.

  2. wayan (unregistered) on November 10th, 2005 @ 6:07 pm


    Before you throw that stone, might wanna stop crowding doors on Metro Buses – to quote you here:

    Ah, but not one of them beats the broad metal and plastiglas of that stairwell. I’ll stand in the aisle when there’s room in the back, but I silent exult when I get that stairwell spot. I move off the bus and hold the doors for folks and then out of the stairwell when I can, but I’d much rather have a leaning spot than a handhold spot. Easier on my knees.

  3. Tom Bridge (unregistered) on November 10th, 2005 @ 8:56 pm

    Never would I lean up against an entire pole in Rush hour, Wayan. The stairwell spot on the bus prevents no one else from a spot on the bus.

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