quiet on the homefront

What’s this, you ask? A hundred thousand protesters in DC this weekend and nary a peep from the Metrobloggers?

Let me clue you in on a little secret. Protests are part of daily life here. Anyone who has lived in DC for more than a month has learned the critical lesson: Whether it’s that crazy guy with the bullhorn on Farragut Square or 100,000 people chanting on the Mall, it’s best to ignore protesters.

Don’t look at them, or they might try to hand you literature that you’re just going to have to find a trashcan to throw away. If you engage with them, they might want to come BACK. And that means more fucked up traffic, edgy cops, and people who are so consumed with love for the ANWR, or hatred for the World Bank, that they completely fail to notice that they’re supposed to “stand to the right.”

Protesters are essentially tourons with signs.

18 Comments so far

  1. dctouron (unregistered) on September 26th, 2005 @ 10:57 am

    ..spoken like a true non-native washingtonian.

  2. Tom Bridge (unregistered) on September 26th, 2005 @ 12:04 pm

    Eh, I don’t know any actually native washingtonians, DCTouron, as there aren’t many people who can stand having their city besieged not only by throngs of tourists from all over, but by protestors who care not for the city’s inhabitants but only for their right to free speech and their ever important “message”.

  3. Peter (unregistered) on September 26th, 2005 @ 12:12 pm

    Well, there ARE some native Washingtonians out there. We just chuckle to ourselves as we indulge your oh-so-precious slams on the ‘burbs and people who don’t know to stand to the right on escalators, because we know it gives you a sense of belonging and hey, we’re generous like that.

  4. JennB (unregistered) on September 26th, 2005 @ 12:19 pm

    I’m a native! (Well, native to the suburbs.) I complain about tourons and standing to the right as much as anyone.

  5. Peter (unregistered) on September 26th, 2005 @ 12:23 pm

    Yes, indeed. You do.

  6. DC Resident (unregistered) on September 26th, 2005 @ 4:15 pm

    Dude, you rawk! Your studied pose of sneering condescension and political disengagement is pitch perfect! You’re so good you could write for the Style section or something!!!

  7. Erin Myers (unregistered) on September 26th, 2005 @ 5:03 pm

    errr.. ummm… I both fall into the category of ‘Native Washingtonian’ and ‘Protestor’. Definitely would NOT consider myself a native Touron. From my perspective, I’m actually pretty psyched to live in a place where people congregate to voice their dissent when necessary. Even if I don’t agree with the movement or the tactics of the protestors.

    It’s actually rather nice to be able to walk out my front door, turn left, walk the 12+ blocks downtown, give ole Georgie boy the finger along with a couple hundred thousand of my fellow americans, and come right on back home – without even having to LOOK at a metro station.

    Personally – I love the tourists. They keep our museums free, our monuments clean, and our cherry blossoms pruned. If all I have to do is run into the backs of them as they stop in the middle of the sidewalk to read a map, so be it.

  8. wayan (unregistered) on September 26th, 2005 @ 11:59 pm

    Nice. Don’t care if you’re here to gawk open-mouthed at the monuments or scream foul-mouthed at Bush. Please stand to the right and generally get outta my way. I’m here to do a job, pay crazy DC taxes, and enjoy this city.

    Your protests are a form of entertainment for me, like the Nationals or the Zoo. Play your role – and please, don’t snarl downtown traffic while you’re at it. Do that on 395 – you’ll make more news.

    As to native or not – a local is someone who can’t get thier act together enough to go somehere.

  9. Glenn (unregistered) on September 28th, 2005 @ 9:36 am

    That’s because protesters are irrelevant and accomplish nothing.


  10. Erin Myers (unregistered) on September 29th, 2005 @ 8:35 am

    Not to be bitter… oh never mind – to be bitter:

    “As to native or not – a local is someone who can’t get thier act together enough to go somehere.”

    Gee… thanks. Actually, in this case, a native is someone who, like 7 generations before her, happens to love DC enough not to leave it to the transients. And yes, we all lived within the city limits (even when it was marshland), thank you very much. So cut it out with the hatin’, wouldya?

    “That’s because protesters are irrelevant and accomplish nothing.”

    In my opinion (and I’m SURE people will disagree, but whatever)if a protest does nothing but provide comfort in the fact that you’re not alone in your opposition to a person or idea, so be it. Personally, I think there’s a lot of power in that.


  11. PL (unregistered) on September 30th, 2005 @ 12:20 pm

    Just to add to the voice of the Natives. I was born in SE Hospital back in 75′, grew up in NW, and SE, lived around here and there from New York to New Mexico, including abroad, but came back home to DC and have lived in capitol hill ever since– because I actually like DC. The free culture, the casual yet metropolitan vibe, the mix of small town calmness and big city amenities, the ability to be real and get away from the plastic and uber-hip yuppies and trustafarians when you need too, yet not be drained of life force by the banality and strip malls of suburbia and vinyl track homes. Oh yea there’s my friends and family too.

    This city is full of natives of all backgrounds. But the transients are the ones that make it difficult to live in at times. DC is saddled with having a major percentage of it’s populace being “part timers” who don’t really care about the city they live in and bring no culture. And lets just admit that the type of people who come to DC just to work are probably not the most interesting breed to begin with. People who move across the country to be bureaucrats after all…

    What’s worse than the transients? The suburbanites (RE Arlingtonians) who think they live in DC and tell people in Airports they are from “Washington” because no one in the world knows where the fuck Northern Virginian is. I have been on airplanes three times in recent memory where someone sitting next to proceeds (without prompting) to tell me they live in Washington, and when I reply “oh great, so do I- Ward 6 what about you?” they have no idea what I am talking about and proceed to tell me that they actually live in Fairfax or some shit, and the never even go to Washington other than work sometimes. Imagine if every idiot in New Jersey said they lived in NYC? I guess it’s not a perfect analogy, but you know what I mean. They don’t add to our civic flavor or make the city better, they just drive in use it, and go back out to Potomac Yards for the night.

    Invest in the city why don’t-cha instead of just bitching about it. Boring you think? Then do something interesting. And a comment to the transients who say they know no natives.
    You obviously are visiting the wrong places.

  12. darpino (unregistered) on September 30th, 2005 @ 12:34 pm

    Transients – tourons with apartments!

    I disagree with you on NoVa tho PL – Arlington, Rosslyn and Alexandria have been feeding DC’s culture since the 70’s – just look at all the bands, artists, writers, and DJ’s that have come from the GW Parkway rim. Not to mention that Alexandria was actually part of DC for years – just because a tax/political map gets re-drawn it does not change the close relationship of the two places. To me these three towns are very much neighborhoods of DC. South of those however – I completely agree with you.

  13. JennB (unregistered) on September 30th, 2005 @ 12:36 pm

    PLAT – we suburb-dwellers tell people we’re from D.C. because if we say we’re from VA, they think we’re all inbred hicks and wonder why we don’t have southern accents.

  14. Jake (unregistered) on October 2nd, 2005 @ 1:28 am

    A big second to this poster’s remark:

    “Dude, you rawk! Your studied pose of sneering condescension and political disengagement is pitch perfect! You’re so good you could write for the Style section or something!!!”

    Seriously, re-think this blog and your voice in writing. It’s just dripping with yuckyness, and snarky narcissism is not the Next Big Thing.

  15. Tiffany (unregistered) on October 2nd, 2005 @ 8:19 am

    I don’t know about my fellow bloggers, but I know I’m *always* sure to take blogging advice from people who can’t be bothered to leave their real information in comments. Viva la cowardly commenter!

    And there’s nothing “studied” about my “pose.” I have no sympathy for people who scream about the injustice the poor and downtrodden experience while simultaneously shutting down the city and preventing those very same poor and downtrodden from getting to their hourly-wage jobs. I’m fortunate to not be in that position anymore, but it wasn’t all that long ago that anti-globo jackasses were actively trying to prevent me from paying my rent by blocking off the street where my job was. So they can bite me, and so can you.

  16. JennB (unregistered) on October 2nd, 2005 @ 12:56 pm

    Don’t quote me on this, but if you don’t like snark, you might – MIGHT – be in the wrong place.

  17. darpino (unregistered) on October 2nd, 2005 @ 1:41 pm

    For the record – I hate the word “snarky” in all its forms.

    “Rawk” however can be quite charming in the proper setting.

  18. The Red Line (unregistered) on October 3rd, 2005 @ 10:08 am

    Caring about stuff is like, so passe.
    I just can’t be bothered, you know?


Terms of use | Privacy Policy | Content: Creative Commons | Site and Design © 2009 | Metroblogging ® and Metblogs ® are registered trademarks of Bode Media, Inc.